Hi I need your help
<p>Feb 25, 2015 11:08 AM</p>
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<a href="http://www.psychforums.com/dissociative-identity/topic157285.html">http://www.psychforums.com/dissociative-identity/topic157285.html</a></p>
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Hi, I need your help...
Postby Niconii » Sun Feb 22, 2015 4:06 pm</p>
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Hello, my name's Andrew and I'm an alter. My host, this morning, was trying to write something in this site, and another alter was trying it to, a little after.
The problem I would like to expose you now, however, is a bit difficult to explain, and before I must tell you to please, forgive my english, because I know I'm not good at all, speaking it. I'm italian and I don't often speak other languages, and my host and the other alters doesn't do it too. We're all too lazy, I suppose...
The fact is that the host, Angela, is engaged with a guy starting two days ago. An alter of our system, Alessia, loves him, and Angela liked to help her, trying to be in love with him because she felt Alessia's feelings reflexed in herself. I don't know if I did explain it good, but I hope I did!
They start to be a couple, he loves Angela from years and Alessia loves him too from years. But she couldn't admit it before, because she suffers from androphobia, problem she accepted to solve.
Angela, then, accomodated Alessia and that guy, but when another alter ( Nicoletta ) came out, today, she ( Nicoletta ) got mad: Nico is attracted by girls only and when that guy started talking about kisses and romantic stuff, she started to cry. So, she asked me to help her, and I've explained the situation to Angy, that feels guilty for this.
She's worry because of Nicoletta and because of Alessia. And the other alters, like Leonard, Rosalie ecc., don't take parts, because they're all bisex and they have no problems with this relationship.
So, here we have a problem only for us four: me, Angela, Nicoletta and Alessia.
I'm an heterosexual boy, but this is irrilevant for me in this case, because the problem with this relationship is that I love my host, Angela. I really love her and she admitted to love me too. But she feels like this is wrong and she wants to have an outside relationship with a person that her family and friends could accept. But at the same time, she's worried to lose me and she said that she wishes that I was an outsider person, because she wants to be my girlfriend.
But now, a moment before I was started to write here, she faced her feelings: when I've searched in this forum topics about love between the host and an alter, she understood that it's not strange or insane. I love her. I really love her. And now she's thinking seriously of it, and she wants to break with this guy. But she know she can't, because it'll make that guy and Alessia suffer. But staying engaged with him will make Nico and me suffer too.
Angy, as a host, worries too much about everything, and tries to make every one happy ( inside and outside our system ), neglecting herself very often. She's a kind of girl but she can't accept that everything she does will obviously hurt someone, because you can't make happy every person in the earth. She refuses to accept the disorder too, but on the other hand she can't deny our existence.
Her parents and friends think she's crazy and don't believe in our existence, so she tries to make them happy and us happy too, saying things like: "Ok, I could or I couldn't have this disorder, but only the psychiatrist knows precisely! I'm waiting for her sentence!". We'll go to the psychiatrist this week, and Angy hopes to have answers... for things she already knows, but the people around her don't.
I'm really worry about her and this situation. I don't want to start an inside war between us four. But I'd like to have a relationship with Angela... and she wants it too. But no one will accept it, outside, and Alessia won't accept it too, inside. How can we solve this problem?</p>